Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Maybe We're Being Punked?*

This is a joke, right?

Disney XD orders “Pair of Kings” a live-action comedy series for kids and families about two fraternal twins who are living a typical teenage life in Chicago, but unbeknownst to them, are the successors to the throne of The Island of Kinkou. The multi-camera series will begin production in Hollywood in March 2010 and begin airing in Fall 2010 around the world.

Starring are popular actor and Walt Disney Records recording artist Mitchel Musso (“Hannah Montana,” “Phineas and Ferb”) as Brady and Doc Shaw (“The Suite Life on Deck” and “Tyler Perry’s House of Payne”) as Boomer.

…Oh dear.

So we've got a wacky buddy show (they're twins! But one is black and the other is white! Craaaazy!) about kids who relocate to a wacky island nation with wacky island ways. Absolutely no potential for inadvertent racism there, no sirree! (Note: sarcasm.)

On top of which, while I know basically nothing about Doc Shaw (I've never seen House of Payne, and the Suite Life on a Motherfucking Boat is so terrible it's essentially unwatchable), I've always been pretty fond of Sandwich Boy and his ludicrous hair. I'm glad he's got another acting project on deck, because he's always been one of the only watchable things about Hannah Montana. And while I didn't have high hopes for him, precisely, I had sort of assumed, I don't know, that he'd concentrate on his music career (that should probably be in sarcastic quotes) for awhile, and then fade away, only to burst back on the scene eight or ten years from now as a charming sidekick on an otherwise-crappy network sitcom.

Instead, it's straight to another Dinsey project, on a lesser-known network, with a premise that seems, at best, pretty dumb, but holds potentially to be so much worse.

Who knew it was even physically possible to step down from Hannah Montana?

* Maybe we'll get to meet Ashton! But probably not, because he's too busy trying to bring The Beautiful Life Colon TBL back from the dead. Uh, good luck with that, dude.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Just when I thought I couldn't love her any more...

Fact: There is nothing in this world that makes me smile more than tap dancing.

Fact: My absolute favorite tweendom star is quintuple threat Jennette McCurdy, who charms me on a regular basis with her singin' dancin' writin' skatin' best-actor-on-iCarly-in' ways.


Jennette tap dances on "iWas a Pageant Girl" from Nickelodeon Press on Vimeo.


Sunday, December 20, 2009

A question for the readers...

Does it count as a toolish wool cap if it's actually weather appropriate? If so, we have #9. What say you?


Thursday, December 17, 2009


I haven't posted here in forever, have I? I suck. In lieu of actual posts containing the hard-hitting making-fun-of-the-Jonas-Brothers you've come to expect from Tweenage, have some quick links 'n' stuff:

- This picture made me laugh because it's so hilariously emblematic of the HP kids. Bonnie: 16 going on 40. Man Radcliffe: Looking like the world's most formal elfin interior decorator. Emma: Rocking an age-appropriate trend that I would probably loathe on anyone else. Rupert: Looking unaware that the British do not generally make stoner comedies, so he can probably stop being all method about it; also, like a hobo. Tom: Not as cool as he thinks he is. And I don't know who that other dude is.

- Dylan and Cole Sprouse Play Video Games with the Eldery. I seriously thought that was an Onion headline at first.

- Just for Becky: Esteban returns to Suite Life! Set the TiVo!

- Okay, a little making fun of the Jonas Brothers, from the always-fabulous Kate Beaton.

- And finally, in the spirit of the holiday, have some Alyson Stoner, who is far more adorable and talented than Camp Rock would lead you to believe: