Friday Flashback: Boyz II Men

Every frame of this video is more hilarious than the last.

Boyz II Men: I'll Make Love to You (1994)

Friday Flashback, and a Discussion Question

Britney Spears: ...Baby One More Time (1998)


Christina Aguilera: Genie in a Bottle (1999)

I recently watched the "Genie in a Bottle" music video for the first time in a while, and I was shocked at how blatantly sexual it is. Not because I felt the need to clutch my pearls or anything, but because I don't remember any controversy about it, whereas I do remember people talking about the "...Baby One More Time" video like the world had come to an end.

But Christina's midriff is just as bare as Britney's, and the song is far more suggestive. While Britney did a cheerful little dance and some gymnastics, Christina spends most of "Genie" rolling around on the beach at night in tiny shorts, and at one point writhing on the hood of a car like the B-roll from a heavy metal video.

(Please note that I think "Genie" is a fantastic video and I am not trying to imply that Christina did anything wrong. I'm just noting that the sexuality is more overt than in "...Baby.")

So why the lack of controversy? Was it because Christina was over 18 at the time, and Britney wasn't? Because Christina didn't combine that sexuality with the trappings of childhood (the infamous schoolgirl uniform)? Because Christina is biracial, and biracial women are stereotyped as being more sexual and can thus "get away" with acting sexier? Or were we as a culture simply inured to the concept of blonde teenagers' bellybuttons at this point?

Let me know what you think! Once you're done watching the videos and reminiscing, that is. It's okay, I'll wait.

Teen Choice Awards Employs Time Travel, Breaks Space-Time Continuum.

The Teen Choice Awards nominees were recently announced, and I am all at a loss. Now, according to my calendar it's 2011, but according to these nominations, I am way off. So what year is it really?

J-Lo as a red carpet icon: 2000?

A girl-on-girl kiss scene for Choice Liplock, and Enrique Iglesias for Choice Male Artist: 1999?

Kevin Bacon involved with anything with the word "Teen" in it: 1984?

Or heck, with Angel, Pacey Witter, Dean Forester, and Clark Kent all up for acting awards, maybe the early 2000s spirit of the WB is simply trying to claw its way out of its grave, vampire-like:



Come on, tweens of today. You have your own heartthrobs. Quit stealing mine, or I'll make you watch more of those WB promos. The one from 2000 is particularly killer.

There's something familiar here...but what?

The new BTR video premiered a few days ago.





Subtle!

Friday Flashback: 'Nsync

Absolutely true story: this is the very first 'Nsync video I ever saw, and I remember watching it on VH1 and thinking that it must be some kind of boy band parody, because no one would ever have Chris's hair seriously. Oh, how wrong I was.

'Nsync: God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You (1998)

Friday Flashback: 2ge+her

In honor of the Big Time Rush special tonight, another semi-fake TV boy band:

2ge+her: U + Me = Us (2000)

Hey there, Boo Boo! Wait, what?

Yes, this makes total sense to me.

Apparently, Justin Timberlake will be voicing Boo Boo in the upcoming Yogi Bear movie.

You know, some days this blog just kind of writes itself.

Friday Flashback: Backstreet Boys

Backstreet Boys: I Want It That Way (1999)


(This is actually not even close to my favorite video ("Quit Playin' Games (With My Heart)") or their most iconic ("Everybody (Backstreet's Back)"), but these geniuses have disabled embedding on, like, everything on YouTube. Boys, I know you're old and stuff, but that's not how you make viral media work for you.)

We really like capslock IMing, okay?

Jess: NICK CARTER IS 30 TODAY. THIS JUST IN: I AM ANCIENT

Becky: WHOA. That is...really not okay.

Jess: I AM AS OLD AS A HUNDRED JUSTIN BIEBERS.

Becky: heeheehee

Jess: Or half a Jason Earles.

Becky: I'm posting that.

Better? Yes indeed!

I know it's not Flashback Friday yet, but hey, remember Boyzone? That's okay, no one else does either, but they were an Irish boy band on the early crest of the pop wave back in the 90s. Like many pop acts from that time (and, well, all the time), they were much more successful in Europe than in America, but I do remember hearing about them when one of their members, Stephen Gately, came out.

Like some other boybands, they've been in the midst of a reunion. In the video for their new single, "Better," while the other members croon at women, Gately sings to a man. Embedding's been disabled, but check it out here.

So, that's kind of cool, right? I mean, it's less groundbreaking than it would be if an up-and-coming boy band did it, but there are no up-and-coming boy bands (more's the pity, and no, the Jonas Brothers do not count), so I'll take what I can get.

The sad thing is that I can't get past how embarrassed I feel when older boy bands perform. Stop it! You're grownups! Go work on your 401ks and get prostate exams or something! I feel like I should be more open-minded, but 30somethings crooning boy band-style just makes me want to crawl under a rock and die. Even when they're crooning to very cute male actors.

I Hear They Had A Bunch of Hits?

How about a short trip down memory lane? TW may be devoted to today's heartthrobs, but we do have some sense of historical perspective. And I have to say, I am fascinated by the New Kids on the Block reunion, and I can't wait to see if a bunch of middle aged dudes can actually win the hearts and minds of today's tweenagers.

At least NKOTB aren't pretending they're still in any way hip:

So you'll forgive Jordan Knight, of the newly reunited senior citizens of boy-band-dom, New Kids on the Block, when he speaks of a "new CD" coming out in the fall, or of the band's new single called "Summertime" that's "climbing the charts." It's quaint, but somewhat antiquated language.

"Wait! Do they even have 'charts' anymore?" chimes in Donnie Wahlberg. "No, it's 'we put our song into a computer bank. And you can go download it onto your — your not Walkman."

(From here, wherein the Kids talk to that almost equally middle aged guy at MTV. The one who isn't Kurt Loder.)

So speaking of Summertime, here we go:



Oh, man. I kind of love it. Most especially I love the half-hearted attempt of choreography at the end. It's very, "Look, we know we have to dance, that's what the kids expect. Damn kids with their rock and roll turned up too loud. Get off my lawn!" On second thought, maybe they should have just stuck with the New Kids Dance.