Saturday, July 18, 2009

A Saturday Night Watching "Wizards on Deck With Hannah Montana"

So the thing is, my sister Rachel does not care about the Disney Channel or tween things. Really. That's why she was the one who initially talked me into watching HSM, and why she watched Camp Rock with us last summer, and why she not only Tivoed Princess Protection Program when I forgot to do it, but actually watched it. And why she TiVoed "Wizards on Deck With Hannah Montana" for me.

So now I am making her watch it! Fun times.

-Alex has dropped from 10 assignments behind to 14 assignments behind in science
Rachel: They only get one assignment a week?

-Justin: "It's ironic that the person who likes school the least…Has to go the most!"
Becky: I like that Gay Older Brother is kind of a dick.

- Parents: "We'll make you go and see all the fun they're having, and then you'll feel bad about yourself! … That's good parenting, right?"
Becky: It's still better than the mom on "The Suite Life."

-Justin: "Look, it's from the teen cruise contest I wrote an essay for!"
Rachel: "Watch while I casually exposit!"

Aboard the SS Tipton…
-Moseby: *is wearing shorts and knee socks*
Both of us: Aaaaaaah!

-Slightly Better Sprouse: *is wearing skinny jeans*
Both of us: Aaaaaaaaaaah!

-Alex: *casts a spell*
Becky: Did she just rhyme "here" with "here"? And why is that an elevator to take them to shore?

-Youngest Russo: "It's one of those clocks for people on to tell the time in their bodies!"
Rachel: Is he brain damaged? Like, actually?

-Slightly Worse Sprouse: "So I hear you're randomly taking people's blood pressure. I'm Zack."
Rachel: That is the best introduction ever.

-Alex: "Ashley Olsen. I can remember that. Ashley… Oh, no. Oh, well!"
Rachel: I think all the Russo children are brain dead!

-Justin: *spit takes*
-London: "That's how you know you're full!"
Rachel: There is no explanation for that line.

Becky: So basically, youngest Russo is just Zack Martin.
Rachel: But somehow dumber.


-Justin: "I'm gonna dump her."
-Alex: "Can I watch?"
-Justin: "I'm not. Going. To cry."
Rachel: Wow, he's a much better actor than this show really calls for.

-Justin: "Would you… Would you go out with a guy who worked in a sandwich shop, and wrote… Stories, and essays…"
Rachel: And fanfic, I'm guessing?

-Not!Tizz (Bailey): *wears horrible yellow pants*
Rachel: OW, MY EYES!

-SBS: *wears white skinny jeans*
Rachel: REALLY????

Rachel: Is it D-Hen's only job to walk around saying angry things? Because I will actually watch that show.

-Miley: *wears purple satin pants*
Rachel: How are EVERYONE'S PANTS worse than the last pair I saw?

-Justin: *takes his shirt off*
Becky: I find the fact that D-Hen is actually ripped really disconcerting.
-Justin: *is now covered in blue*
Rachel: You could just take off the latex suit.

-Justin: "This is Alex, I know my sister!"
-Moseby: "This is Zack, I know my hooligan!"
Becky: Awww, Zack is his hooligan.

-The show: *makes no sense*
Rachel: It's sort of like a middle school play.

-Zack: "Isn't there something you'd like to say to me? That rhymes with 'I'm … florry?'"
-Moseby: "You're flannoying?"
Rachel: I thought he was going to say, "You're a bad rhymer."

-Youngest Russo: "I'm never going to wash that cheek again."
Rachel: What, no "You've never washed that cheek before!" joke? How do you miss that beat?!

-"Hannah Montana" episode: *is unwatchably boring*
Becky: Why is the Hannah Montana episode so much less manic? And more dull?
-Suite Life characters: *all enter*
Becky: That actually improves things.
Rachel: Where did the Wizard kids go?


-Zack: "I've got chocolate shirtcake!"
-Hannah: "I don't like chocolate."
-Zack: "That's okay. I've got vanilla in my pants pocket…"
Rachel: SO INAPPROPRIATE, OMG.

Rachel: Who's that other kid? … Wait, that's Oliver in a stupid wig. Why so many stupid wigs on this show?

Rachel: I like how it's clear Billy Ray just couldn't be bothered to go to the set to film and that's why all of his scenes are in bed.

-Not!Tizz: "Did you do this?"
-Cody: "Bailey, if this relationship doesn't have honesty, it doesn't have anything. … Yes, I did."
Rachel: See, it's funny because he's lying to his girlfriend.

Becky: Well… that was dull.
Rachel: Instead of going wacky, they tried for pathos. On "Hannah Montana."


In conclusion…

Rachel: So Slightly Better Sprouse is dead in the middle of his awkward phase, huh?
Becky: For five years now.


The end!

5 comments:

NightOwl said...

I'm guessing you didn't like it? D: It was okay for me, but the Suite Life part ruined the Theme song and I'd consider the Hannah Montana episode more of a regular episode, except with guest stars. I hated how Cody(SBS) was calling 'Alex*Actually Harper*' by her full name. It just got annoying, even after they all met each other and stuff. My brother's just glad that Hannah Montana remembered the cake thing, for continuity. Oh yeah, why wouldn't Miley/Hannah and/or Lilly recognize 'Mckayla'/Alex? It's not like she was wearing a disguise when she was McKayla. Sorry if I'm rambling now. D: Bye

Becky said...

I actually enjoyed the Wizards quite a bit; I've come to really like Selena and D-Hen, and while ridiculous it was entertaining. But you're right that the HM episode was less of a crossover and more HM+guest stars, on a boat for some reason.

I think the repeated reference to her full name was supposed to be the gag because *she* kept saying it, because it was a lie? But it fell really, really flat. Harper was by far the weak link of the Wizards cast.

I guess McKayla and Alex are just different people who look a lot alike? They could have at least put in a gag about it, though. That would ahve been fun. And made sense. (Too much to ask, I guess.) But then, with the gag where Alex couldn't remember which Ashely she claimed to be, I kept expecting a Tisdale joke, and it never happened. Alas.

NightOwl said...

Yeah, I remember Hannah Montana had the same problem during the last crossover (Back in 2006, I believe).
I was disappointed in Harper's acting, seeing as she somewhat does better on normal episodes.
For the Mckayla thing, maybe it's because "If cupid had a heart" wasn't playing in the background. And she had highlights in Hannah Montana, too.
Still, Selena has guest starred in Zack and Cody, but that's pushing it.
I think everyone was expecting a Tisdale reference.

Jessica said...

Cody has a girlfriend??? Does his gay know about this?

(Also, um. Did you save this on the TiVo for me?)

Ryan W. Mead said...

This actually set a viewing record for the year to date...and I was watching its competition, a certain yellow guy celebrating his 10th anniversary that Disney is proudly flaunting they trumped in the ratings. I guess nautical nonsense no longer be something kids wish.

Based on the recap, it sounds like the "Hannah Montana" episode might actually have had sizeable crossover in it, which is rather interesting: the last time Disney did a crossover in 2006 (advertised as "That's So Suite Life of Hannah Montana"), the first two episodes had sizable crossover, but the "Hannah Montana" had a plot that had nothing to do with it (other than an opening regarding the fact that Hannah had played a set in Boston, stayed at the Tipton, and had Maddie stalking her when she was there) and could actually be played alone without the other two- although I don't think Disney has actually has, surprisingly. (In their press release flaunting their ratings, they also referred to 2007's "Wish Gone Amiss" as a crossover event, it really wasn't- the advertising claimed that the shooting star that appeared in all three shows was supposed to be the same star, but other than that, the episodes had nothing to do with each other and all three episodes have been shown independently afterwards. It's more like one of those cross-promotion events that Disney's sister network ABC used to do, like having all of their shows one night be set during a storm to promote some Stephen King storm TV-movie or having Salem the Cat send everyone on the TGIF block back to a different time period.)