Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Countdown to HSM3: The Top 10 Things We'd Like to Say to the Cast

10. "Anyone who plays an East High faculty member, right on down to the principal and the pregnant science teacher: Stop. Just stop. You're a terrible actor and no one likes you. Go away."

9. "Monique, you are super cute and sassy. We should be BFF. Call us!"

8. "Manley (director Kenny Ortega's dog, who plays Sharpay's dog): man, what is your life like? Cheetohs for dinner and watching Anchors Aweigh every night, am I right?"


6. "Baby V, you need to stop singing through your nose. Also, you need to stop calling yourself Baby V."

5. "Okay, Kenny, you're not technically a cast member, but whatevs. We appreciate the homoeroticism in everything you make. Keep up the good work! But maybe let the HSM thing end while it's still joyously bad, before it becomes just plain old bad."

4. "Lucas, you are way too good for this shit. You should pretend you don't know that, though, because because this shit is the primary reason you're going to go on to have a decent career, so don't behave like a jackass."

3. "Corbin, honey, someday all those tingly feelings you get around cute boys - and your love of leopard print - will make sense."

2. "Tizz. All the plastic surgery in the world will not turn you into Reese Witherspoon. You are smart and funny and you need to give up on the Rom Com Princess dream and start making a career that works for you. Might I suggest teaming up with Josh Peck to make a series of wacky comedies penned by a couple of bloggers? Just throwing that out there!"

1. "Oh, Zefron. Perhaps you should consider more movies where you are not singing and especially not dancing. Because you are very, very bad at dancing. AND DO NOT MAKE A FOURTH MOVIE. NO MATTER WHAT FRANCHISE THEY PROMISE YOU. IT IS CAREER DEATH."

And in the spirit of getting things off our chests...


Audrey said...

Quoix?! Status Quo cuts off right before Gabi chucks food at Sharpay! That's the best part!

Also, I never realized just how few people actually have secrets at East High. I mean, all the tables are dancing but only three people confessed in the song. :/

Lulu will be a Big Time Star now. He's in Real Movies and Stuff. I can't wait until he's EVERYWHERE!!! :D

Sophie said...

So, not related to the post [though I do love your lists as they are amazing and snark-filled <333] I would like to point out that you guys were mentioned in an afterelton article. How cool is that?

Rebecca said...

@Audrey: Sorry about the video -- I was pretty exhausted last night when we posted, so I didn't actually watch the end. Alas. And let us just HOPE Lucas ends up everywhere, because that would make the world a more fun place.

@Sophie YAY! That is AWESOME! Thanks for the link. <3